When It Hurts Too Much To Run

Posted on May 22, 2013 by

Normally, running is my escape, my stress relief and my joy. In April I discovered this isn’t always the case.

In April my 17 year old daughter Emily, who was studying abroad in Germany for the year, was hospitalized for three weeks. (You can read part of that story here.)

During those weeks I spent with her in Germany running hurt too much. Life hurt too much.

The first week my husband and I tried to run twice, going about five miles. Five miles is my favorite maintenance distance, an easy distance. But it wasn’t easy. My heart hurt. My side hurt. I started hyperventilating. I had to walk.

After running 100 miles per month year round, this didn’t make physical sense but our bodies aren’t just physical. We’re emotional, mental, spiritual AND physical beings, with everything inter-connected. Stress and worry made running impossible and my body said, “no.”

I still needed exercise but something less strenuous. So we walked and biked. It was about 10 kilometers to the hospital from her host family’s home and Germany is much more bike friendly than the good ‘ol USA. Almost every day we either biked the 20 kilometer round trip or we got a ride or rode the bus one way and walked back. 

When Emily was strong enough to fly home we arrived four days before a 12k I’d registered to run with my 11 year old son. Still jet-lagged I ran with him, amazingly just a few minutes slower than the pace I ran last year. I can’t say I enjoyed the running part of that race and I was sore for several days, but I loved being with him after three weeks apart. 

Since then I’ve resumed meeting my running partner twice a week at 5:30 AM, I’ve gone on a few solo runs and I ran the Windermere half marathon, since I’d already paid to register.

As always, the partner runs are a wonderful outlet of camaraderie and support. The half-marathon was good to do and to my surprise I managed a confidence-boosting 6 minute PR.

But the solo runs are still hard. I used to let my thoughts wander on the run, processing the ups and downs of life with each stride and breath. I craved a couple of those runs each week and always ended ready to tackle life with gusto. Now I have to keep my thoughts on a short leash so they don’t run away into worry and frustration. As I’ve learned, that makes me hyperventilate.

Emily is doing better, especially now that she’s home, but life looks different. It’s like a mudslide took out the road she had mapped. It took out the road I had mapped as her mother. As she blazes a new road it may resemble the old road but we are all forever changed.

It’s going to take a lot of runs to get my body, mind, and spirit back in sync. It’s going to take a lot of runs before I can see the new road. But I know what the run has done for me and already, like a friend, it beckons with a promise. It whispers that if I just put one foot in front of the other, I’ll fly again.

More importantly, so will my daughter.

Have you ever lost the joy of running?

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Ready to Race

Posted on April 5, 2013 by

I love to run AND I love to race.

As a 9ish-minute miler you won’t see me standing on any podiums but something about running races gets my competitive juices flowing. I race faster than I run, even though I’m just racing myself.

I also love the atmosphere of races and rubbing elbows with other runners. It’s a fun community.

And races make me motivated to train. Like a lot of people who love running, sometimes I still struggle to get out the door. That’s when having a race on the calendar provides a little extra motivation.

Here’s my race calendar for 2013 (so far):

  • Strides for Sandy Hook. Jan 20. I ran this 5K fundraiser run with my 5th grade son. I love running with that kid. He talks the ENTIRE time. This wasn’t about running fast, especially with some of the trail covered in ice. It was about getting out with my family and running for a good cause. Bonus that my 14 year old son placed 2nd and got a plaque.
  • Frostbite 5K. Jan 26. This fun run was an anniversary of sorts. I started running again in 2010 after wogging this race in 33:42. I’ve come a long way since then. This year I beat that time by a mile. Literally. I ran it in 25:51. At my current pace I could have run another mile in the same time my 2010 self ran 3.1. That improvement makes me happy.
  • Bloomsday 12K. May 5. I haven’t signed up for this one yet but plan to run one of the largest road races in the world with my 5th grader. This may be the last year I can run with him. He’s getting too fast.
  •  Windermere Half Marathon. May 19. I’m really excited about this race because my last 13 mile long run was 4 minutes faster than my fastest half marathon time and I even stopped to take a picture. My goal is to break 2 hours.
  • St. Joe Half Marathon. June 9. This one is a maybe, but if the weekend is still free and my body is still injury-free and we have the budget for another race, I’m doing it. My running partner ran it last year and said it was fun and beautiful.
  • Missoula Half Marathon. July 14. It’s looking like the year of the half marathon. Several other High School Cross Country parents are running this one and it sounded like fun. Plus, we haven’t done a race in Montana yet.
  • Pacific NW Spartan Sprint. Aug 4. This is the race that scares excites me the most. I needed a new challenge and several friends and my husband are doing this race as well, so it will be a social trip to the other side of the state. To train I’ve added a weekly Insanity workout and try to do planks and pushups after every run to get more core and upper body strength. That change has helped my running but I’m no-where near as strong as I should be and I’m thinking about dropping another running day so I can cross-train more. That’s a hard trade-off since running is what keeps me mostly sane.
  • Leavenworth Marathon. Oct 5. Yup. I have another full on the calendar, but I’m doing a fall marathon this year so I can concentrate on getting faster and stronger this spring and early summer. This event is in a pretty little town in the Cascades that mimics a Bavarian village. Octoberfest is a big deal there and my husband and I are using it as a romantic weekend getaway. Isn’t that funny to plan romance around running? But it’s fitting. We run together once or twice a week. Sharing that activity and focus has strengthened our marriage more than any other thing over two decades together. I don’t know if he’ll run with me or run his own race. He’s a LOT faster than I am. But either way we’ll celebrate with beer and perhaps some bratwurst. I’m looking forward to it as much as I looked forward to our honeymoon.

That’s all I have booked, for now, but figure I’ll add in a fall half marathon (probably the Sandpoint Scenic Half again) during my marathon taper and probably a couple summertime 5ks too. Looking at that calendar of races makes me smile. It also makes me want to go running.

Do you enter races? What do you like about racing? What’s your favorite distance to race?

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Running with Music and Memories of the Mix Tap

Sony Walkman NWZ-W262

Meet my newest running partner. All that time I spend using social media paid off with the best Klout perk I’ve received to date. I took this baby out for a run today and found myself flooded with memories.

I’m going to date myself with this post but my first Sony Walkman was a hand-held tape player. Yeah. It played cassette tapes. It had a belt clip but whenever I tried to run with it the heaviness made it flop around too much so I carried it like a baton while I listened to a mix tape that featured more than one shiny, happy song by the B-52′s.

Remember the mix tape? I had a running one, a driving one and one my boyfriend made me. Making a mix tape was a serious time investment that said “I love you.” I ended up marrying that boyfriend. It must have been the mix tape.

Creating a mix tape for exercise used to be serious business. I remember sitting for what felt like hours using the dual-cassette feature on my stereo. If you road-tested a song and it was too slow you couldn’t just delete it and add a new song. That would require a lot of work finding a song exactly the same length, or living with partial pieces of music playing in your ear.

Usually you just dealt with the rpm or held the fast forward button down for a block or so.

While I’m nostalgic over the mix tape I far prefer today’s method of making soundtracks –  the playlist – which is a lot more convenient and customized. It took next to no time for me to upload five hours of uptempo songs on this cute little over-the-ears Walkman and hit the pavement. It took one button touch and barely a step to jump to the next song if the beat didn’t meet or match my pace.

Yeah. I like this new toy enough I think I’ll name it Cindy Kate, in honor of the B-52′s. I didn’t run to the B-52′s today. They’re not even on my playlist, though I have about 1.8 mb left so I could easily add a song for nostalgia’s sake.

Instead, today’s five-mile soundtrack included a lot of techno songs my son suggested (good suggestion), some Sick Puppies, Adam Lambert, and my age-old favorite – Billy Idol. White Wedding will never, ever get old for me.  And it sounds great playing on this wearable, wireless Walkman. I just hope the water-resistant feature is fully functional. I sweat a lot.

Do you run with music? What are your favorite songs to exercise to? Did you ever make or receive a mix tape? 

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Running Toenail Troubles

Posted on November 13, 2012 by

For several years I’ve read about the toenail troubles commonly experienced by endurance runners, but didn’t share those woes with my toes. I figured this was because I buy my running shoes a full size larger than my street shoes. My toes like space. They don’t like brushing up against the end of the shoe.

Then I ran my third marathon in May. Maybe I didn’t clip my toenails close enough. Maybe I didn’t tie my shoelaces tight enough, to keep my foot from sliding forward. Maybe it was only a matter of miles before a toenail protested the constant pounding on pavement.

By the end of the marathon my right big toenail was throbbing and discolored. Over the next week 3/4 of the nail turned purple, then black.

For a while I wore a bandage on the toe, hoping the nail would reattach. It sorta did, and though the nail remained blackened, the color faded to a dull bruise. Rather than paint over it, for the first half of summer I left it alone, an ugly testament to my achievement.

Throughout the summer I expected the toenail would fall off. It didn’t. Instead it clutched at my toe like a cliff jumper who grabs on at the last minute, then fights to keep his grip.

This was a losing battle. A new toenail grew underneath the old one, pushing at it the way a permanent tooth displaces a baby tooth. But my original nail was healthy on one side. It clung tenaciously when the rest of the nail let go. When the nail started catching on things, like my socks, I bandaged it again and asked my Daily Mile friends for advice. They recommended clipping it before it tore.

With most of the toenail clipped, my toe felt naked, exposed and vulnerable but this beat the brief searing pain when it flapped and grabbed at the bed sheets.

Then my youngest child became a klutz and kept accidentally stomping on it, sometimes with soccer cleats. That’s the drawback to toenail troubles in warm weather – no protective shoe barrier. I also became a klutz and kept stubbing it against things. The new nail, which was thin and flimsy, couldn’t grow fast enough.

Five months after my marathon the last nub of the old nail finally loosened enough for me to clip it away. Today, 6 months post-marathon, the new nail is almost complete, though it’s still a puny version. Who knew they take so long to grow? About every ultra runner out there, I suspect. On top of running amazing miles, they lose toenails so regularly some of them, like Dr. Lisa Bliss, have their toenails permanently removed.

I’m not an ultra runner and I’ve only had one troublesome toenail. Compared to some of the other challenges I’ve faced as a runner, like injury, this was an interesting nuisance. it wasn’t enough to make me reduce my mileage or even notice it for more than a moment or two at a time.

And for some reason my blackened, ship-jumping toenail felt like one more running milestone to check off the list. Like a secret handshake or code-word, it’s another way I belong to this club of athletes who rave about running. A  troublesome toenail is, after all, such a small sacrifice for this sport. Toenails are expendable. The run endures.

Have you lost a toenail? How long did it take for you to grow a new one?

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Running Funny in my Favorite Shoes

Posted on November 1, 2012 by

I’m lucky to have two great and faithful running partners. Not just my shoes. Twice a week I run with Susan at 5:30 in the morning and most weekends I long run with my husband.

Still, I can relate to this comic strip because I’ve been wearing the same brand of running shoes for years. All my life I’ve had hard-to-fit feet. Before kids they were a size 9 AAA. After kids that turned into a 10 AA. Try finding those sizes in your standard store. You won’t.

I special order most of my shoes but I can pick up a pair of Brooks Adrenalines (which I’ve been wearing since version 4 or 5) in a size 11N at my local running store, Runner’s Soul. With a funky little lacing secret I can keep my heel from sliding forward and they fit just fine.

There are a couple other brands that come in narrow sizes and I own a pair of Nikes, so I can alternate every other day, but the Adrenalines are by far my favorite. They’re my go-to shoe.  In fact, I bought a new pair on sale last week because the new version comes out this month. I’ll start wearing them once I’ve logged another 25 miles on the old pair.

My only complaint? I can’t get a narrow shoe in fun colors and I’m SO BORED with blue and white. But I’d rather wear a boring shoe that never gives me blisters and helps keep injury at bay than lace up a hot pink pair and end up hobbling home. Though I’d really like a hot pink pair of running shoes.

What are your favorite running shoes? Favorite color of running shoes?

About the comic:  Since I run kinda funny, I like to post running comics courtesy of Jason Nocera from Running Shirts and Gifts. Jason also creates custom comics. He runs AND he’s funny.

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Back-to-School Resolutions

Posted on September 11, 2012 by

September always feels like a new year. It’s my birthday month and back-to-school all rolled up in one. As a kid, the smell of newly sharpened pencils and the sight of perfect Crayola crayons lined up like little soldiers in my 64 count box were enough to make me feel anything was possible. So did blowing out all those birthday candles.

So, in September I pull out my list of resolutions from January to see how much progress I’ve made. Then I make adjustments for the final few months, like a GPS recalculating the route.

Apparently, I felt like anything was possible last January. My list, which covers three categories, is filled with exuberant optimism. What was I thinking?! 100 pushups at one time? Another finished novel? Clearly, I was deluded. If I’m determined I might manage 50 pushups at one time by January 1. Maybe.

Fitness Goals: Out of the 14 fitness goals I made, I’m on track to meet four or five of them. By December 31st I’ll probably have run at least 1000 miles and, if I work at it, I should be able to hold a 3 minute plank.

It’s clear I didn’t lose 10 pounds by my May marathon and my marathon time goal is going on my 2013 resolution list, since I didn’t achieve it and I’m not running another one this year. Actually, I’ll probably carry quite of few of these fitness goals forward while continuing to work toward them. I’ll get there. It’s just going to take longer than planned.

September Resolution #1: Keep Working on the Fitness List while Meeting the Attainable Goals. At minimum, I need to add another minute to my plank length and log another 255 miles before December 31.

Writing Goals: If the 9 goals I set were a finish line, I’d be the runner who ran off the course and got hopelessly lost in the woods. Forget the finisher’s tape. I’d like to find the trail again.

It’s not that I haven’t been writing. I have. But I’ve been writing completely different things than I’d planned back in January. This is okay. I had several unexpected work referrals and landed two new clients. That’s why this blog has sat mute, with nothing new to say in months.

September Resolution #2: Keep the Clients Happy While Adding Back Blogging and Fiction Writing in Doable Doses. 

I won’t be updating the blog three times a week like I’d planned in January and my twice-weekly coffee date with the novel-in-progress isn’t going to happen, but I can safely expect that the next four months will have more unpaid-writing-just-for-fun than the last four months. I just set the bar really low there. I didn’t write just for fun one time in the last four months. My September self must be more of a realist than my January self. Thankfully, I love my job as a freelance wordsmith and the paid writing is also fun. In fact, it’s a lot of fun.

Speaking of fun, this year I made a list of……

For Fun Resolutions: Out of 6 resolutions I’ve met 3 of them. Yay me. Only 1 of the other 3 is attainable at this point but I’m plenty happy with my 50% success on this category, particularly since I met my resolution to make a new friend this year.

When I made that a goal, I wondered how to make it happen. I didn’t just want a new acquaintance. Those are easy to come by. I wanted a new friend, which is far more difficult. I’m busy. Other people are busy. Building a friendship takes time and intention. To make this goal more challenging, I wasn’t doing anything to meet new people and I didn’t have a plan.

By serendipity it happened anyway. When I blogged and wrote a newspaper column about doing the memorial run for Sherry Arnold, a local running club added my invitation for other runners to join me that morning. One other runner came. We ran a few miles together and discovered we run the same pace and only live a few miles apart. That was enough common ground.

Since then we’ve run together at 5:30 AM most Tuesday mornings, alternating between our neighborhoods.  We’re forging a friendship on foot, mile by mile and each week I look forward to chatting with Susan on the run. It’s fun. As a side benefit, it’s made my conversational pace get a little bit faster. It’s also helped me toward those other resolution categories, like working toward that 1000 mile mark. It’s even helped my writing, since Tuesdays tend to be one of my most productive writing days of the week.

While I’m still working toward a lot of those January resolutions, if my new friend were the only resolution I’d met this year, I’d consider it a success.

September Resolution #3: Keep Fun at the Forefront of the Final Months of 2012.

Do you make September Resolutions? January Resolutions? How are You Faring on Your Goals?

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Running Vacation

Posted on May 25, 2012 by

Cartoon about Running Vacation

It’s funny how many runners bend their vacations around the run. We’ve scheduled our “leave-the-house” time for after a long run and mapped new running routes on MapMyRun when we knew where we’d be staying for the night. (When you spend most vacations camping, you usually don’t know where you’ll be spending the night.)

Last year, however, before my husband and I traveled to Phoenix to see the Ducks play in the BSC National Championship, I first found two nearby parks so we could run the trails.

This was obviously taken before the big game.

Those runs were the highlight of our trip and probably would have still been the highlight if Oregon had won the game.

This game was a lot of fun. It would have been more fun if we’d won.

 

 

We recovered from our 3 point loss by running another trail. Yes, I’m wearing the same shirt from the previous night. Why get a clean shirt all sweaty when I can get a lightly worn shirt all sweaty instead?

Our approach to running vacations is mild compared to some runners we know. A triathlete we see at a lot of local races and running club events, for example, asked if my husband and I had started scheduling our vacations around out-of-town races. The glint in his eyes was that of a running evangelist and his shirt was a moisture-wicking billboard for a half-marathon in California – obvious race swag.

I replied, “not yet.”

Over the last two years I’ve looked up quite a few marathons at Marathon Guide and then priced the cost of hotel and airfare for a winter weekend running in a warmer locale. I really liked running trails in Phoenix in January.

Each time I look, the itch to race somewhere new gets stronger and stronger. It’s only a matter of time before I scratch it. Until then, I’ll keep mapping new routes.

How do you run your vacations?

About the comic:  Since I run kinda funny, about once a month 3Rs posts a running comic courtesy of Jason Nocera from Running Shirts and Gifts. Jason also creates custom comics.

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